On The Rise
by Avalon's mists
Summary: Au: Jack writes in his diary about life, his roomate and everything. Turns out Chase refuses to buy the pudding cups on the shopping list.
1. Chapter 1

Guess who saw Dr Horrible's Sing Along Blog? This is a AU mildy based off Dr Horrible and his character. He reminded me a bit of Jack and Xiaolin Chase.

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Dear Diary,

Wait I think I should call you a journal, diary sounds girly. Wait, why do I care? No one is ever going to read this. Well moving on now, I'll deal with the name crisis later, I have a identity crisis going on here! Which is actually why I have this diary, notebook thingy, my roommate Chase told me to write down my feelings in it. Actually now that I think about it, it is weird that a guy is telling me to write about my feelings.

I think I might be evil. The world is such a mess and I just need to rule it! That might not be evil but I don't think planning to conquer the world is good exactly. It's for the greater good after all as Chase would say. So now my room looks like a war room, with cool computers and robots. Chase made me leave the tv in the living room, he said the apartment would feel strange otherwise but I think it's because he wants it to watch his Firefly DVD's.

Speak of the devil Chase just came in. I actually smell him before I see him some days, now I may be a genius but he's a martial arts master and once a week he goes to every dojo, fighting temple, and martial arts school he can find in search of fresh blood. Some room mates come home smelling of sex and booze, mine comes home smelling like other peoples sweat. Be right back diary, I mean journal, I need to stop Chase from sitting on the couch like that.

Well I'm back and Chase is in the shower. Sometimes having Chase as a room mate is kind of annoying, the training and meditating gets old fast, and I still haven't got over seeing so many non illegal leaves in the kitchen. (Someone's addicted to tea) Don't get me he's an awesome 's only 4 years older then me yet he's a martial arts master, nearly world renowned, and so nonchalant about it all! Plus he's the second fittest person I've ever seen, the first is his friend Guan but Guan kinda scares me.

It's kinda hard to be around him though, it sounds weird coming from me but this is my diary.... Okay Chase is this handsome, aristocratic, goody two shoes who completely ruins any reputation I try to start as a super villain. I turn on my webcam to record my terrifying speech to the world, he walks by in a fluffy blue robe and asks me if he can use my DDR mat. My comments doubled but it was people either making fun of me or asking him out. The days of people not taking me seriously is certainly coming to a middle. So then I kicked his pasty butt in DDR.

He doesn't really take my evil world domination attempt serious either. He keeps calling me Dr Horrible.

That's the plan, rule the world, you and me any day.


	2. Tell Me I'm Pretty

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Dear Diary, I mean journal.

What a mess! I forgot it was Chase's day to spend with Omi ( some little nine-year-old from one of those big brother big sister programs.) Omi looks like a cheeseball with a body. His head is huge and his ego is twice as big. He's also some sort of martial arts prodigy which explains why Chase likes him so much. Omi's a worse fanboy then me! Wait that came out wrong, why am I writing this in pen?

I feel bad not liking Omi sometimes, only sometimes though. He really does try hard to be nice, it's not his fault nine-year-olds are annoying. Plus he lives in a foster home with a old man and a gecko. I'm guessing it got lame fast and he's been there nine years. Lets not even mention that Chase is a strange role model; I once found him three sheets to the wind, stripped down to a pair of blue boxers, and singing a song about goblins. That was weird....on many levels. I'm just going to try and forget about that.

He's lucky he's cute because I have more then half a mind to send one of my newest robots after him, Omi, not Chase, and I call them Jackbots! Lets never mind the technical things right now robot wise these are a whole new generation of robots. I made the first of the new batch last night but avoiding Omi and Chase has given me lots of time to make more. Now I have a small army of special Jackbots; the Yes-bot, the Cheerleader-bot, the me-as-a-robot-that-used-to-be-a-Cheerleaderbot and I'm working on a Chameleon bot. Or maybe I should name it the Ninja-bot. They're all in great working condition with the exception of the robot me. He used to be a girl robot and now he has some issues.

For now I'm writing and watching Chase's Firefly DVDs. He won't care, hopefully, and if he doses he will never find out. I happen to know him and Omi went out to watch some childish cartoon movie. Or something like that, I wasn't paying so much attention when they asked me if I wanted to come. I was elbow deep in robot at the time so I said no.

This is a really good episode so I'll finish this entry later.

Hey Diary did I ever tell you I seem to have horrible, horrible timing? Guess when Chase came in? When I was staring wistfully and asking the wall if it thought I was pretty. After looking at me strangely for a few seconds the entire below exchange of weird sentences happened.

_Tell me I'm pretty._

_**...Were I not holding a cake I would take you in a manly fashion.**_

_Cause I'm pretty?_

_**Cause you're pretty. Now do you want cake or not?**_

Thank goodness he has a sense of humor or that would have been really awkward. Anyway he brought that cake home hours ago and I think I've gone into sugar shock. I would have preferred pudding cups but Chase refuses to buy then. For a guy that claims he needs to eat 'real food' he certainly has a huge sweet tooth.

Weird thought, the probability that we're making out in another universe is two to the power of 234235. Yum, probability voyeurism and cake. Actually that was kind of a creepy thought. Why am I still writing in pen?! I'd go and test my Chamaeleon bot but it would startle Chase and a startled Chase would smash it. Death by room mate was not covered in the warranty.

"Want to say love your hair but there I go mumbling...."


	3. Hero Complex

Here is the next installment of the diary. I don't think it's as funny but I can't edit it humor, It just never works for me. Should this take a more serious turn or should I keep it light hearted? And should Jack get a life?

Dear Diary,

The Chameleon bot. is done! Not only does it impress me it impresses the people on my video blog! So my blog was a success after all. I'm counting it as a success because it works and my viewers are happy. It was somewhat less successful in that I inadvertently left my bedroom door unlocked and my Me-bot followed Chase into the bathroom and asked him for a lesson on human anatomy. (The weird thing is I think he was serious. He's not exactly . . . anatomically correct. I really need to do some more work on that bot . . . )

Long story short it freaked out Chase, big time. So he went out for a run and the police brought him back three hours later. Covered in blood! That part is really important! It was scary! According to the police he had stopped a potential kidnaping, but not after fighting four guys with guns.

How did I end up with the hero complex room mate? Why can't I just work up the courage to shake him by the shoulders and scream at him for being such a moron?! He's going to get himself killed playing the hero. I don't want to be the one to tell Omi, and Guan, and, Dashi, and all his little monks that he's dead. I especially don't want to have to cover his share of the rent. Moving off the depressing scary things.

I went to the store today and got pudding cups and guess who I ran into? Kimiko, one of Omi's friends. She's this Japanese girl who called me a 'creepy robo geek' the first time we met. Clearly we are the best of friends. I exaggerate, she's not that bad once you get used to her and her stupid outfits. Who wears a lime green corduroy mini skirt? It's bad enough they exist let alone people wear them. Fortune smiled upon me though, little miss rich girl had pity on 'creepy robo geek' me and payed for my stuff! According to her I'm too thin and needed the food. That's kinda sad in a way. But hey free food! So my ego can take a break for a while.

If it wasn't about midnight and Chase wasn't in the kitchen trying to wash the blood out of his clothes I think I would make a snack. I think he's a bit self conscious about bringing it to the apartment blocks basement washroom. I would be too if my clothes were covered in blood and gore. Either way I don't want to fix myself a snack by the guy wringing blood out of his shirt. He actually told me it was their blood so it makes it even grosser. Though I appreciate the honesty. Not, you know, a lot but still.

What do I live in land of the bizarre circumstances or something? Why does this stuff always happen to me?


	4. Battleship

I had this written down and it took me forever to type. Next chapter is also handwritten and contains wacky shenanigans.

Note, even though Chase in this is not Heylin I wouldn't really call him good Chase since there is no Lao Mang Lone Soup in this universe. He's more of what I'd call normal and this is what Jack picks up on the most.

Even though this universe contains no dragon soup Chase will have a transformation near the end of the fanfiction. I won't spoil it for you but when Jack mentions something call KICK the end is near, or close to near.

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Dear Diary,

The mebot has more issues then I originally thought, It has taken to wearing the clothes my mother sends, the ones that don't' make me look like a "Scary goth boy." And it's only wearing those because I sent its old cheer uniform to Goodwill. Watching yourself prance around like that is just unsettling. Chase is unnecessarily amused by this so I booted him out so I could try to fix mebots personality issues in peace. Joy of joys he came back with Guan.

Guan only lives a few blocks away in a flat over his martial arts school but he and Chase are always hanging around each other. They honestly spend way to much time together to be straight, they would deny it, actually some of the stuff they've said unconsciously denies it, but I refuse to accept two guys can possibly be that close, well it was three but Dashi left for the Peace Corp, or Green Peace or something like that. Wow Chase has weird friends. I know they've known each other for forever but still, it gets weird.

Like that time they both came here covered in mud and little shards of blue and white pottery, and then they both held me down when I tried to answer the land line phone.

So anyway moving on. My last video blog entry went well. They were very impressed , but someone mentioned I had no actual plan to take over the world. I know I'm not much of a person for specifics but that sounds like a problem, even to me. What am I supposed to do unleash some sort of virus? I've always been fonder of the more eccentric villains.

Jack Spicer, evil boy genius and his trusty room mate: the guy who could take on the cast of ever martial arts movie he owns but is still getting his butt handed to him at battleship. I can tell this because they had it out when I retreated into my room and I can hear Chase giving little motivational speeches to his "drowning men". No they cannot hear you, you can stop talking to your little plastic ships just because you're losing! Why in the world is Guan encouraging this? Stop encouraging him he sounds crazier then my mother!

Maybe I should experiment making some sort of drug to take over the world....

"_I don't know what their problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce."_


	5. My Mom Is Nuts

How you know when my stories are bugging me. I take idea's from tv . The next two chapters are mistaken for gay based off. I'm just really annoyed because I just can't start Just Young(Another fanfic of mine). And I'm having trouble continuing Time Portal (Even though I know exactly how it ends.) Frustrating!

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Dear Diary,

Second to worst day ever, the worst day will come tomorrow because it seems tomorrow is my inevitable death. My mom came over today for a surprise visit. I really like my mommy, more then the average guy who no longer lives in his parents house I bet, but I'm not going to deny she's not playing with a full deck. She pretty much bounced in, did her whole, "Hi Jackie!" thing, which was a lot less weird when I was eight, and then went off talking and sorting through the things me and Chase tend to leave out. The Wii, the chessboard, his blue patterned teapot, that bizarre silk robe that I've never seen him use as a robe (but I have seen him use it as a tissue when he watched Titantic, Sophie's Choice, and Land Before Time, not that he ever admitted to crying, or even to watching them after he was done.)

So I knew she knew about Chase being my roommate, he's been my roommate for nearly a year now, and I've told her about some of his stranger exploits. Like the time he was so out of it he went to work without pants. Luckily he was working as a stunt double at the time and he managed to wear his costumes pants. The world got to know two things that day, one Chase has no qualms about walking 46 blocks with pants on (He told me he sort of woke up around block 4) and two Chase owns Hello Kitty boxer.

I wouldn't I have expected what was coming next if I could have seen her cue cards! She jumped straight up in the air and started babbling about how cute my boyfriend was. If I was shocked Chase was horrified. He looked like he was about to turn himself inside out and strangle me once he was done. Biggest WTF look ever.

I had to drag him to the farthest away room(it was the bathroom o joy)to explain. It doesn't help that I had next to no idea what was going on but by the look Chase was giving me I thought I'd give it a chance, I might as well have been talking to my dad.

So then I got to explain how my mother was completely delusional, sweet and loving but bonkers, and that she had probably assumed that since I hadn't moved into a apartment with a girl she'd decided that us two were dating. And I still don't believe this but Chase came right out and said he had moved here because the location was good and that I was unlikely to molest him in his sleep. Thank you for that vote of confidence, although I suppose I should thank him for not killing me. And agreeing to pretend to be my boyfriend while my mom is here. All it took was telling him about the time I told mom that lasagna wasn't my favorite food anymore. I remember her literally being netted by young men in white suits.

I so owe him. And wouldn't you know my mom bubbled over with glee. How in the world did she fall for that? I mean Chase, maybe, he looks girly enough, actually he kinda looks like Alexander's lover, from that movie Alexander, but me? It's probably a good thing my mom doesn't go in my room.

Now I'm just worried about the fact she said she's bringing dad tomorrow. Mom will apparently love me no matter what I do (And that includes taking over the world, also starting a salted peanut factory) dad nearly slaughter me when I didn't want to go to a military academy like him. I'll have to rely on the fact Chase doesn't want me dead, I do pay the majority of the rent after all. And where else is he going to find a room mate that isn't going to molest him?

Oh crap I'm so screwed.


	6. Aww Nut Bunnies

Finally updated this. I wanted to add a Freakazoid reference but that's probably going to be next chapter. For anyone who's also curious about Time Portal, I have some done but I want to finish the whole thing and post it in a nice, spaced manner. Not 3 months, then 10 months, then another chapter in two weeks. I've been getting distracted like a lunatic by my sudden "wow Guan's kind of a cool character" epiphany.

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Dear Diary,

Remind me to murder Chase. I'll explain later. I spent half the day worrying my butt off and preparing for my parent. I even cleaned. Chase was his usual helpful self which bugs me to no end, and made dinner. And by dinner I mean he made spaghetti and cupcakes. Chocolate cupcakes with pink icing. I don't even know where he found pink food coloring! Neither of us can cook much apparently, which explains the weird food combination.

I live off pudding and things I can cook in the microwave and that's defiantly out for feeding my parents. Cup of noodles is not their usual five star fare. Now that I've thought of it, all I've ever seen Chase cook is toast, rice and things made from instant curry mixes. That's kinda weird, since clearly he bakes. At least the cupcake I stole tastes good. Maybe he only knows how to make cupcakes. His sweet tooth has got to get tired of sugary breakfast cereal. Anyway now that I've reminded myself how lame we are when it comes to cooking (Notes to self, make Jack-bot learn to cook.) I need to get back on track. Another one of Omi's friends cooks and Chase called in a favor. On one hand, Clay is a good cook, on the other I didn't need more people to know about this. He left at six and my parents came at seven and I think my stomach tried to crawl up my throat at seven o one.

My father wore the creepiest, Men in Black outfit ever. He was probably trying to be intimidating. I hate to admit it, but it kinda worked on me. We've never had the best relationship. Primarily because it's hard to really love someone who scares the crap out of you and tells you clowns are going to eat your heart. When people ask why I seem so much more attached to mommy I always wonder how I answer without rolling my eyes.

Chase spent the first fifteen minutes trying to be pleasant to my parents and luckily not just parroting back gay stereotypes from crappy sitcoms. I spent them trying to stuff Jack-bot inside a garment bag inside the closet in my room. I don't want him wandering around during this. When I come back out my father, has backed down from Chase and is sitting on the couch. How did Chase do that? Not only did Chase snag the tallest chair in the house (something my father always tries to do so he can look down on you), but he's staring at him like he's a falcon and my fathers a mouse. Heck, it's more like he's a dragon, and my father's still a mouse!

I've got to start giving that guy more credit. I think he even got father to respect him, and of course mommy's still in love. She's going to be so disappointed when she hears about the 'break up'. Up until a point, that point being dessert, I was actually starting to get kind of jealous. Why can't I suck up to people this well? It might not actually be sucking up, it might just be the whole combination of traits goody two shoes has, but still, being social has its perks.

After that point I just wanted to strangle Chase, which is of course a bad idea since he could probably kill me with his pinky. He told. He just tossed it in there

"By the way, as far as I know Jack isn't gay, and neither am I." Cue my mommy going into shock. Sure she's okay, but I did the dumbest thing when Chase told. I was so in character I accidently said

"Does that mean you're breaking up with me?"

I'm in my lab right now, waiting on an experiment, and possibly dying of mortification. Chase is in the living room, teaching Jack-bot how to do some weird Tai Chi moves.

One thousand years of darkness when that bot learns how to fight, I don't even trust him with the can opener and he's programed to obey me!


End file.
